Why don’t men court anymore? The answer from psychology
Are you wondering why men don’t court anymore? Actually, you have a point: unfortunately, courtship lately is often skipped in...
Can we love two people at the same time?
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Is love supposed to last forever? Are we the same at 20, 30, 40 or more? Does our partner take the same direction as us in our personal evolution? Not easy, especially since time often does its work of undermining. This is why it is more than likely that at some point in our lives, a meeting or a very strong friendship with someone will gradually turn into a feeling of love, thus casting doubt on the established belief that we can only have eyes for one person, the official…
Is it really possible to love two people at the same time? Is it possible to be in love with two women or two men at the same time, or is it just a pretext to cover up the desire for infidelity?
To love only one person: a social conditioning?
It is true that in our modern and traditionalist societies, our vision of the love relationship and more largely that of the couple is conceived and built exclusively by a relation between two people. The couple remains above all a prerequisite for the creation of a family by the conception of children from two individuals (very often a man and a woman). The love serving as binding necessary to this realization.
But beyond the couple and the family, comes the notion of the individual. The blooming and the balance of the latter are the sinequanones conditions to the blooming and the balance of the rest. As such, we generally rely too much on our partner to help us achieve this goal, which often depends only on ourselves.
Indeed it is unrealistic to think that our partner will bring us everything and all the time and this at all levels. It is unrealistic to think that our partner will provide us with everything all the time and at all levels. We may then come to believe that we can fill these gaps with a third person without destroying what has already been built.
Do not confuse desire and love
It is easy to get lost between love and desire. It is very easy to desire two women or two men at the same time. But it is much less easy to put the same emotional involvement in two relationships at the same time. To love someone is to support them, to have time (a lot) to devote to them and especially to have common projects with them. It is objectively very complicated to meet all its requirements for two people.
To love is above all to give, and it is difficult to give the same commitment to two people at the same time…
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