Why don’t men court anymore? The answer from psychology
Are you wondering why men don’t court anymore? Actually, you have a point: unfortunately, courtship lately is often skipped in...
Do we need to be loved to be happy?
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To answer this philosophical question, I suggest a little research on the Internet. Not too long, just a few taps to check 3 notions:
1. First notion: what is love?
When asked what is love, the web answers: A strong feeling that pushes us to love (someone), to want to do good, to help by identifying more or less.
2. second notion: what is to be loved?
To the question what is to be loved? We are informed on this same web, more precisely on the site of the famous dictionary LAROUSSE that it is to be the object of someone’s love or sympathy.
These two meanings encourage us to consider that to be loved is to provoke in others the desire to wish us well. That we thus become the object of his love or sympathy.
Taken literally, these definitions seem to suggest that this other person is necessarily another being, man or woman. But, thinking beyond, can’t this other be something else than another man or another woman?
An animal you will say? Yes, why not… to be loved, one can be loved by an animal, it does not seem so far-fetched as that. Here is the beginning of the answer… look again…
Who can also feel for you this lively feeling called love?
Who else can you inspire with love or sympathy, the desire to be helped?
LOVE YOURSELF TO LOVE YOUR LIFE…
Think about it, you’ve been living with this being since you were born, you’ve even been living in it since it is you! In a word as in hundred, to be loved yes you can be it and even must be it first of all by yourself! You owe it to yourself to feel first of all this lively impulse for yourself!
3. Third notion: what does Freud say about it?
I propose to you now to call upon Freud who notes in To introduce narcissism that:
Thus, to extend his remarks, you will agree with me that when you have a relatively high self-esteem, life seems to you to be less difficult, the things to be done are more pleasant and even full of sympathetic moments or of moments of happiness. From there to say that to be happy you have to be loved, there is only one not! And to invite you to continue our reasoning by enjoining you to love yourself first to claim happiness!
LOVE YOURSELF TO BE LOVED BY OTHERS…
By cultivating this love of yourself, you will do yourself good, you will nourish your identity. You will once again present yourself to the world in interesting and rewarding ways. Since you look better in your plate, you will offer to others something other than a closed face and an insecure walk. You will become joyful again, bright…
As a result, the inner change will spill over to the outer. All the good that you will do to yourself, all the good that you will say to yourself in petto will exist outside too…
Soon, new people will want to enter your life, to make your acquaintance attracted by this radiation. Old relationships will look at you differently, act differently… so many new opportunities to find love as a couple, to find happiness as a couple…
So soon faced with the question must we be loved to be happy? You will certainly nod your head and give a big, clear and loud YES. Without forgetting to complete this statement with this precision: it is necessary to be loved to be happy but that is within the reach of each one: it is enough to start by loving oneself! Go ahead, all you have to do is…
