Why don’t men court anymore? The answer from psychology
Are you wondering why men don’t court anymore? Actually, you have a point: unfortunately, courtship lately is often skipped in...
How to overcome a breakup?
Reading Time 3 minute(s)
Accepting Grief
A love breakup is one of the most painful times in life. An experience that can be compared to a mourning, with an added element: the voluntary departure! Indeed, when the other breaks up, we are confronted with the absence but also with the decided, chosen abandonment, contrary to the death of a close relation. Also, in addition to the sadness of being alone, the feeling of abandonment overwhelms us accompanied by its best friends: incomprehension and injustice.
Also, the sadness felt after just being left is not surrounded by the same compassion as that felt during a bereavement. Indeed, it doesn’t take long to reach our ears the famous One lost, ten found! As if it were incongruous to feel grief on this occasion, because almost less annoying than having lost your keys! This way of dealing with it is not due to the lesser importance of heartache but to the fact that it is common. Everyone knows at least one break-up in their life and there is no choice but to go on, and the best way to do so in the popular imagination is to love someone else… The opposite of grief. Obviously, this way of approaching the breakup of a love relationship is clumsy. No, you have not only lost your keys. When your loved one has left you, it is the North that you have lost, you no longer have a compass, so being overwhelmed by grief is normal. Paradoxically, accepting this grief will be the first step towards your healing!
Give yourself time
Time to cry, to eat ice cream, alone in your corner. Then, when all the tears are out, clear your mind and body by seeing your friends. Avoid talking about it with them. Being left is scary and many of them unconsciously think that it can be caught. So not only will you bore them by bringing up the subject over and over again, but you’ll also be sending them back to an ancestral fear that they can’t control… which will make them uncomfortable and of little help to you!
If you want to talk about it and get objective and constructive support, a professional, such as a psychologist, is the best way. He or she will help you to live with and overcome your grief and finally, the time you wanted to fly again with your own wings. It will also keep you away from hasty decisions that you would regret because they were made under the influence of violent and distorted feelings.
Play sports
To regain your senses and your life, sports are an asset. Setting yourself goals and challenges on a daily basis and above all maintaining and achieving them will restore your self-confidence. You will once again be the decision-maker on important aspects of your life: health, lifestyle and figure! The effects of continuous sport will soon be seen on your physique, but it is your mind that will be boosted! You will then be ready again for a new and very beautiful love life…
